Part 9 - The Barbecue

 "Got your allergy medication?" Benedict Cumberbatch asked James as we all poured out of the bus.

 "Yep," James replied, "No horse is going to stop me now!"

 "Don't stop me now... " Benedict sang, "Don't stop me -"

 "Cos I'm havin' a good time," James interjected, "Havin' a good time!"

 "I'm a shooting star leaping through the sky!" I added.

 "Like a tiger," Hanien continued.

 "Defying the laws of gravityyy," Annisa practically yodelled the last syllable.

 "I am a racing car," James began to wiggle his hips back and forth, "passing by!"

 "Like Lady Godiva!" Benedict shouted.

 "I'm gonna go, go, go," we all rumbled, "There's no stopping me!"

 We proceeded to hum to the end of the first chorus before filing into a long line against the wooden fenced elipse that ran down the centre of the flatter field. James and Benedict followed a couple of other adults into the office block at the beginning of the field. I could feel the wind cut my cheek with its chilling claw but I shrugged off the discomfort and smiled with every muscle in my face. Around me, I could see my happiness mirrored in all my friends' faces - Annisa, Hanien, Eliphia, Tom and Isaac - and I was almost certain we'd all burst from sheer joy.

 "It's going to be a great week." Eliphia had voiced what we were all thinking.

 "That it is," I agreed, "That it is."

 It's a good thing the site was so empty when we arrived because less than half an hour later, the field was cluttered with at least twenty tents that all bore our school emblem (a laptop that was a television on one side and a book made out of the other). The tents were roughly the same size and could hold eight people - two in each compartment. The idea was two teachers and six pupils in one tent. In my tent, the teachers were James and Michael Fassbender and the pupils were Annisa, Hanien, Eliphia, Isaac, Tom and I. In the tent next to us were Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Fletcher from McFly and some pupils from their classes.

 Divvying up rooms, we realised that Tom, James and I had had fairly similar experiences camping. We had similar habits of unpacking and I was interested to hear some of Tom's theories as to how to light a sleeping compartment to enable some reading before bed. Obviously - and regrettably - I couldn't share a sleeping compartment with James, so Tom and I took the one on the right closest to the front door if you were looking in from outside. To compensate for the out-of-balance girl to boy ratio, Annisa and Isaac volunteered to take the compartment beside Tom and I, leaving Hanien and Eliphia in the compartment next to James and Michael.

 As we unpacked, James, Michael, Tom and I taught those not from the UK some of our nation's great pub anthems. This of course meant 'Chelsea Dagger' by The Fratellis.

 "Do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do do-do do-do!" James warbled.

 "Do-do-do, do-do-do, dae-do do de-do," Michael replied.

 "Dum-de-dum, dum-de-dum, dum-de-dum de-dum de-dum," Tom continued.

 "Dum-de-dum, dum-de-dum, de-dum dum de," I hummed.

 "Dum!" we all finished.

  "That's the whole song?" Annisa asked, incredulous.

 "Well, that's the chorus," James admitted, "But that's the general gist of it. Come on, then."

 And so we all do-do-doed to the end of our unpacking and I have to say, it really did make the process feel faster.  Once we were finished, we donned our fleece-lined waterproof jackets and emerged into the outdoors. I could barely see anything at first because the wind whipped my hair into my face and my hair is long ... I mean really, really long. Eliphia offered me a bobble to hold it back and mercifully my vision was restored just in time to see James do a Bugs Bunny impression.

 "What's for dinner?" Isaac asked eagerly.

 "Probably a barbecue," Michael shrugged.

 "But it's freezing out here!" Isaac had stopped walking and seemed shocked into paralysis by news of the night's dining.

 "Yeah," James nodded, " The fire from it's supposed to heat you up!"

 Isaac shuddered but started walking again.

 "Where are we going?" Hanien asked.

 "To get food to barbecue," James replied.

 "How?" Annisa asked, "We don't have any cars and I don't see any shops around anywhere."

 "We have bikes," Michael replied and began to barrel towards the bus.

 Underneath the bus was a deep compartment that spanned the entire area of the bus floor. James produced a key from his pocket, twisted it in a lock in the centre of the compartment door and flung the door open. Mounds of bikes lay haphazardly like an overgrown CD collection on the linoleum floor of the compartment.

 James and Michael hauled out eight bikes, all of varying sizes, placing them in front of us. Mine was the deep blue of Ravenclaw house from Harry Potter. I swung my leg over the crossbar and dragged the pedal up. Michael shoved the door back into place and James handed out helmets to everyone.

 "Ready?" James called over his shoulder as he mounted the bike.

 "Ready," we replied.

  We began slowly but were soon  thundering along the dust-strewn country path towards the main road. Once reached, the road swept us along its tarmac with minimal effort on our part and our attention could be focussed on staying out of the occasional car that trundled past us. The wind whooped around my ears and I could see the shirts off everyone in front of me flapping in the wind. James's black tracksuit jacket was practically a parachute it was so filled with air.

 When we reached the supermarket, we decided to split into pairs to shop for food. James went with Eliphia, Michael went with Annisa, Hanien went with Isaac and I went with Tom.

 "Nee-aow!" Tom screeched as he oversteered the trolley into the dairy aisle, "Vroom vroom-vroom vroom vroom-vroom vroom."

 "Yum, dairy," I smiled, "I love cheese!"

 "Hey, I have an awkward question," Tom murmured, studying the cheeses, "Do all four of you girls love James?"

 My brain stuttered to a halt and my stomach leapt a few inches into the air. I'd never really talked about anything 'James' related out loud. I honestly didn't have an answer ready at all. I mean, who asks someone if they're in life with someone nineteen years older than them with whom they're on a camping trip?

 "I um ... I don't know," I muttered, "I mean, he's incredible but, how am I supposed to know?"

 "They say a crush is live when it persists for four months."

 "It's been over ten but I don't know whether that means anything. Please don't tell him, though," I whispered.

 "Of course not." Tom nodded and picked a wedge of Edam from the shelf. "I wouldn't do that, I promise."

 Tom and I made a quick round of the supermarket, filling our trolley with all manner of cheese, pasta sauces and instant meal cheesy pasta. We reunited with everyone at the checkout and I had to hide behind Tom or risk James spot me blushing every time I looked his way. Eventually, we were all ready and soon atop our bikes riding back to the campsite for our barbecue.

Part 8 - I Spy

By the next Monday morning, the bags were packed, the bus was hired and the consent forms were signed. James had sent us all to bed early the night before and roused us at six-thirty am. I was lucky enough to hear him coming, which meant I avoided being awoken by the metal of his key pressed against my back, which was the fate awaiting about half of our class. Annisa's scream, in particular was probably what aroused me from sleep. I had no idea one human could make such a high-pitched sound.
James seemed to find our reactions hilarious and practically skipped along the corridor to the kitchen, laughing with glee. Hanien, Eliphia, Annisa and I trudged along with the rest of the class and poured into the living room, kitchen and bathroom. I was halfway through my cornflakes - the four of us were sat on a set of two two-seater couches that directly faced each other - when James approached and hopped onto the back of the couch opposite me. This was the one on which Eliphia and Hanien sat.

 "Excited?" he asked with a grin.

 "Yeah," Annisa replied, "But Joanne's been warning me about the weather."

 "I don't think it's too bad." James cocked his head to the side. "I mean, there are a couple of light showers a day and there's one day with a very heavy shower. Temperatures are around seven degrees, I think. But we'll do lots of exercise and go cycling and walking so I'm sure we'll be warm enough."

 "Wait, where are we cycling?" I asked.

 "Kirroughtree. You know, the one with the taster loop and the really smooth stane?" James seemed surprised that I knew what he was talking about.

 "Stane?" Hanien raised an eyebrow.

 "It's a forestry commission thing, I think," James explained. "There are seven stanes - stones, I mean - and the idea is to go all around Scotland cycling the different tracks and getting pictures with the different stanes."

 "The one at Glentress has Klingon engraved on it!" I exclaimed, remembering that James was a trekkie.

 "Oh yeah, on the way up to Betty Blue!" James nodded. "Betty Blue's one of the tracks. Blue means moderate difficulty and Betty, well, it could just have easily have been Billy Blue. Okay, I'm going to go check on some other people. Still sure about Cream o' Galloway?"

 We nodded that we were and relaxed into the couches.

 "I spy with my little eye, something beginning with ... T!" James declared. He was sat in front of us on the bus but kept twisting around to talk to us. We were on the left side of the bus, very near the front. I sat at the window seat directly behind whoever was next to James and Hanien was beside me, directly behind James. Behind me was Annisa and behind Hanien was Eliphia.
 "Tree!" Eliphia exclaimed.
 "Nope," James grinned, "I'm not that obvious!"
 "Tyres?" Hanien suggested.
 James shook his head and giggled.
 "Oh, wow!" came a shout from beside James.
 "I recognise that voice," Annisa murmured.
 "I just saw Peter Capaldi's 'Doctor Who' costume!" the voice continued.
 "Oh," I realised, "Essex accent. Whovian. Letter 'T'. Hi, Tom!"
 James nodded. "You got it!"
 "So... " Eliphia giggled, "The thing beginning with 'T' was Tom Fletcher ... Of McFly?"
 "Yep." James nodded.
 "What?" Tom whirled round to face us.
 "Oh we're playing 'I Spy'," I explained, "He's got a cool coat hasn't he?"
 "What - Oh Capaldi?" Tom replied, "Yeah, he's going to be a very 'cool' Doctor."
 "Ironic given that the last one taught kids that cool is not cool," James added.
 "Yes, well, I guess you need variety," Tom concluded, "So 'I Spy'? Okay, um, I spy with my little eye, something beginning with R.S."
 That stumped us. All five of us slumped into our chairs and tried not to look at the smug expression on Tom's face. After a while, we drifted slightly and began to ramble on about X-Men.
 "What's ironic," James chuckled, "Is that in the 'X-Men: Evolution' cartoons, Wolverine is Australian! And I could understand if they had an American actor and didn't make him do an Australian accent but they already had an Aussie actor! Why on Earth did he not keep his accent?!"
 "You almost always change your accent and that's because it's important to the plot of the story. Wolverine was supposed to seem really gloomy and to be honest when I watched the cartoons I always had trouble believing he was as temperamental as he was meant to be because he was always saying things like 'dingo'," I noted.
 "So you're saying that Hugh Jackman played Wolverine as American because Australians are too much fun?" Tom summarised.
 "Yep."
 Suddenly, the bus swerved and I spotted a small car dodging around haphazardly in across the lanes of the motorway and heard the bus driver cursing at it under his breath. The bus thundered onto the hard shoulder and juddered as the driver struggled to right it. Once we were back on course, Tom - that's kid Tom, not Tom from McFly - leaned over across the aisle towards me and tapped my arm.
 "Rumble strip," he mumbled.
 "Yep!" Tom - the one from McFly - shouted, "You've got it!"
 "Okay, I'll go next," Isaac, who was sat next to kid-Tom announced, "I spy with my little eye ... Did that sign say Wigtown?"
 "Oh!" James exclaimed, "So it did! We're here!"
 The bus trundled onto a gravelly farm path and soon led us onto a flat field of grass. The field was dotted with tents and a few fences. In its centre was a narrow ring of fences that enclosed a few skinny trees and at the boundary to our right was where a more immediate threat than crazy canonist extremists was waiting for James: three horses.