Quick note: Annisa and I (Joanne) are real but we only know each other from Twitter and are both fairly obsessed with James McAvoy. I made up Isaac so I'd be very surprised if he actually existed. I started this for Annisa but I'll try to include as many fandoms as possible.
The bus juddered haphazardly to a stop at the traffic lights, the seats creaking forwards from the force. I glanced around the bus's inhabitants, inspecting our new classmates. There were thirty pupils in total, from all walks of life, all races, all colours, all religions and they were roughly split even between boys and girls. The seats of the bus were striped with the colours of the rainbow vertically down grey felt and the aisle between the sets of seats had a peculiar sticky sensation to it.
The teenagers hadn't spoken much for these first ten minutes of the journey, mostly because nobody knew which language to speak to anyone. Those whose first language was English felt guilty for imposing their language on people; those whose first language was not English didn't want to attempt it for fear of messing up the complicated grammar rules. Eventually somebody beside the driver asked for the radio to be turned on and a calming acoustic song floated out of the speakers.
I grinned and began to mouth the words. Across the aisle, a dark-skinned boy with lanky black hair began to sing a few lines. I took it as a sign and joined in.
"'Cause I wanna be... Mr Pond, and I can't lie and sa-ay that I'm fond of the way you've been hurled, into our world. Now that you've saved the day with don't you fly away?" they sang.
The girl beside the boy leaned right towards him and asked him who Mr Pond was.
"He's from Doctor Who," he smiled. By now about half the bus had joined in. "Technically he's Mr Williams but the Doctor doesn't understand how marriage works so he thinks that Rory took the last name of his wife, Amy Pond."
The girl saw me smiling and introduced herself with an extended hand. "Annisa."
"This is Isaac." Annisa gestured towards the boy, who promptly shook my hand. "I think Isaac and I are the only people here that actually know each other."
"I'm Joanne. How come you both got accepted?" I remembered my application. It had specifically mentioned that only one per cent of applicants actually got accepted. It would have been very unlikely for two people from the same country to have been accepted, never mind from the same town.
"We had a joint application. Our special event was a twenty-four hour picture spam war. Isaac was on Doctor Who, Sherlock and Merlin. I was just using pictures of James McAvoy." Annisa grinned.
"You're a McAvoyer?!" I exclaimed.
"Yeah! Are you? Well, obviously, you are. How long have you been?"
"About nine months but it probably would have been longer had I seen him before that! He's my favourite actor that I applied with!"
"Awesome. I used him for my major fandom and as my favourite actor."
"What about you, Isaac?" I asked.
"Major fandom is Star Trek. Favourite actor David Tennant." Isaac's tone was slightly monotonous as he examined a syllabus leaflet. He lifted his head. "Sorry. I was a bit absorbed. You do realise James McAvoy is one of the teachers here?"
"Yes," I sighed, "I hope I'm in his class."
"You probably will be," Isaac assured me, "Actually, us too. They try to put you with your favourite actors and writers as much as possible and since Annisa and I are joint entry, we'll probably both end up in his class."
"Cool. So where are you two from?"
"Malaysia, where the sun never gives us a break. And you?"
"Scotland. Hamilton - to be precise. A small town a few miles outside Glasgow," I replied, "And yes that is a few miles away from where James grew up. Do either of you know where we are now?"
The car that had taken me from Hamilton to the 'School Terminal' had travelled in what felt like circles for hours and although I was fairly certain we were still on the British Isles, I had no more of an idea than that.
"I think it's kind of like Hogwarts. We aren't really anywhere," Isaac surmised.
"How can we - never mind." Annisa shook her head. It probably was best to just not think about any of this logically.
"Does anyone know how far away it is?" shouted a voice that hadn't yet broken from near the middle of the bus, just in front of Annisa, Isaac and I.
The bus driver bellowed, "We've got about an hour to go!"
I could see the boy's shoulders slump as he crumpled into the fold of his seat.
"Yeah, I feel him," Isaac admitted, "I think I'm going to go for a nap. Wake me if we go for a toilet stop."
Isaac snuggled down into his headrest and made a high-pitched smacking sound with his mouth that sounded as if he was tasting wine and was unsure about his favourite. He was sort of gangly but quite short, which seemed impossible but somehow completely accurate. However he could be described, his knees were suspended against the back of the next chair and his shins were crossed over in a basket, hanging in mid-air.
The duration of the bus journey passed with quiet conversations between Annisa and I and the occasional word, murmured in his sleep, from Isaac. Finally, mercifully, the bus juddered to a stop outside a grandiose, sprawling building made of worn sandstone. I'm fairly certain that the spindly stone protrusions from near the edges could be described as turrets. I could imagine this as the Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, or Hogwarts, or basically the boarding school from any major fandom. It was a fitting place for this school.
As we unloaded from the bus we could hear the hyperventilation of dozens of teenagers, presumably because all of their dreams had just come true, or at least, the ones that involved idols. The actors and writers - writers of television, film, novels, comic books, everything - came flooding out of the building and trickling towards us with the trepidation of an explorer approaching a venomous snake. I spotted Matt Smith, Steven Moffat and Benedict Cumberbatch all walking together. And there was Cassandra Clare, author of the 'The Mortal Instruments' series! And Peter Jackson! And Ian McKellan!
"Do you see him?" Annisa asked.
"James?" I turned to face her.
"Of course," replied Isaac. He grinned. "Who else?"
"No, I don't see him," I replied, "But you're right, Isaac. We're probably going to be in his class. We'll see him soon enough. Allons-y!"
"What's that?" Annisa frowned.
"It's let's go in French," Isaac exclaimed, "Remember, it's what the Tenth Doctor says?"
"Um, yeah, sure," Annisa smiled.
We shuffled forward towards the steps that led up to the entrance. By now we were amidst a great herd of students all chattering about whose autographs they were going to get and whom they hoped to get as a teacher. Apparently there was some science/magic stuff all around that made this whole thing possible in the first place but nobody liked to ask. Everyone was too afraid that it would spoil the science/magic.
"So, why are you two so admiring of this guy?" Isaac asked.
"Well, to start with," I began tentatively, "he's hard-working. Thinking about how much effort he put into drama school makes me want to try harder at stuff. He's intelligent and mature but also extremely silly and fun."
"There's no point being grown-up if you can't be childish sometimes," Isaac put in.
"Fourth Doctor?"
"Yup."
"Nice. Anyway, I just in generally look up to him and want to be like him when I grow up. Not acting, writing instead, and preferably I wouldn't be a man but other than that. What about you Annisa?"
"Just that he's so sweet and caring." Annisa ran her hand along the banister. "Mostly what you said. You kind of stole all the words."
"Sorry about that," I giggled. "Does anyone have any idea where to go?"
Suddenly a hand appeared on my shoulder and another, identical mirror of it, on Annisa's. It had a pale complexion but was blotched red, which made sense given that the sun had decided to make an appearance and swelter us. Well, it was probably nothing to Annisa and Isaac but to me - and the hand - it was like I was playing Wii Tennis in a sleeping bag. Annisa and I turned around hurriedly, anxious to know who was being so 'friendly'.
Of course it was him. Of course. That's just how the Universe works.
"Um, I know where to go," James McAvoy ventured, "I hope I do anyway. I mean, I've been here for a year now so you'd think I would."
"Ah - Um - I - Uh," I stuttered, a sentiment echoed by the bu-bu-bu-bu sound that Annisa made.
"Oh, for crying out loud, you two." Isaac rolled his eyes. "Hello, I'm Isaac. This is Annisa and this is Joanne. They both have you down as their favourite actor and Annisa even has you down as her favourite 'fandom'. Please excuse them for sounding like fish."
"Excused. Actually I think I recognise those names." James fished a crumpled sheet of white paper with a table of names on it out of his pocket. "Yep, Annisa, got you and... Joanne?"
"Yeah?" I croaked.
"What's your last name? I can't find you on the list."
"Ferguson." Oh My God. What if I wasn't with him. What if I was with someone I respected but didn't ... that didn't have ... that wasn't James. He is my hero. He is my idol.
"Hm... I um... " He frowned. Then something in him like resolve seemed to crack and I could see his shoulders quivering. "Oh, would you -" giggle "-look at that. I uh, have been looking at it this whole time and just manipulating you with acting for my own pleasure. Got you."
"That was cruel and narcissistic," I noted, "but just funny enough to be worth it."
We all softened and turned back towards the school as James motioned us all towards the front doors. I could sense Annisa tense as James guided her with his hand then struggle to relax as she realised how strange that must have seemed. I giggled. This whole day was strange.
"Well," James announced as Isaac opened the door, "Welcome to the Internet School For Fandom Youngsters. Get the reference?"
"Yeah," we all answered together.
"Then you're going to love it here," James grinned.
The bus juddered haphazardly to a stop at the traffic lights, the seats creaking forwards from the force. I glanced around the bus's inhabitants, inspecting our new classmates. There were thirty pupils in total, from all walks of life, all races, all colours, all religions and they were roughly split even between boys and girls. The seats of the bus were striped with the colours of the rainbow vertically down grey felt and the aisle between the sets of seats had a peculiar sticky sensation to it.
The teenagers hadn't spoken much for these first ten minutes of the journey, mostly because nobody knew which language to speak to anyone. Those whose first language was English felt guilty for imposing their language on people; those whose first language was not English didn't want to attempt it for fear of messing up the complicated grammar rules. Eventually somebody beside the driver asked for the radio to be turned on and a calming acoustic song floated out of the speakers.
I grinned and began to mouth the words. Across the aisle, a dark-skinned boy with lanky black hair began to sing a few lines. I took it as a sign and joined in.
"'Cause I wanna be... Mr Pond, and I can't lie and sa-ay that I'm fond of the way you've been hurled, into our world. Now that you've saved the day with don't you fly away?" they sang.
The girl beside the boy leaned right towards him and asked him who Mr Pond was.
"He's from Doctor Who," he smiled. By now about half the bus had joined in. "Technically he's Mr Williams but the Doctor doesn't understand how marriage works so he thinks that Rory took the last name of his wife, Amy Pond."
The girl saw me smiling and introduced herself with an extended hand. "Annisa."
"This is Isaac." Annisa gestured towards the boy, who promptly shook my hand. "I think Isaac and I are the only people here that actually know each other."
"I'm Joanne. How come you both got accepted?" I remembered my application. It had specifically mentioned that only one per cent of applicants actually got accepted. It would have been very unlikely for two people from the same country to have been accepted, never mind from the same town.
"We had a joint application. Our special event was a twenty-four hour picture spam war. Isaac was on Doctor Who, Sherlock and Merlin. I was just using pictures of James McAvoy." Annisa grinned.
"You're a McAvoyer?!" I exclaimed.
"Yeah! Are you? Well, obviously, you are. How long have you been?"
"About nine months but it probably would have been longer had I seen him before that! He's my favourite actor that I applied with!"
"Awesome. I used him for my major fandom and as my favourite actor."
"What about you, Isaac?" I asked.
"Major fandom is Star Trek. Favourite actor David Tennant." Isaac's tone was slightly monotonous as he examined a syllabus leaflet. He lifted his head. "Sorry. I was a bit absorbed. You do realise James McAvoy is one of the teachers here?"
"Yes," I sighed, "I hope I'm in his class."
"You probably will be," Isaac assured me, "Actually, us too. They try to put you with your favourite actors and writers as much as possible and since Annisa and I are joint entry, we'll probably both end up in his class."
"Cool. So where are you two from?"
"Malaysia, where the sun never gives us a break. And you?"
"Scotland. Hamilton - to be precise. A small town a few miles outside Glasgow," I replied, "And yes that is a few miles away from where James grew up. Do either of you know where we are now?"
The car that had taken me from Hamilton to the 'School Terminal' had travelled in what felt like circles for hours and although I was fairly certain we were still on the British Isles, I had no more of an idea than that.
"I think it's kind of like Hogwarts. We aren't really anywhere," Isaac surmised.
"How can we - never mind." Annisa shook her head. It probably was best to just not think about any of this logically.
"Does anyone know how far away it is?" shouted a voice that hadn't yet broken from near the middle of the bus, just in front of Annisa, Isaac and I.
The bus driver bellowed, "We've got about an hour to go!"
I could see the boy's shoulders slump as he crumpled into the fold of his seat.
"Yeah, I feel him," Isaac admitted, "I think I'm going to go for a nap. Wake me if we go for a toilet stop."
Isaac snuggled down into his headrest and made a high-pitched smacking sound with his mouth that sounded as if he was tasting wine and was unsure about his favourite. He was sort of gangly but quite short, which seemed impossible but somehow completely accurate. However he could be described, his knees were suspended against the back of the next chair and his shins were crossed over in a basket, hanging in mid-air.
The duration of the bus journey passed with quiet conversations between Annisa and I and the occasional word, murmured in his sleep, from Isaac. Finally, mercifully, the bus juddered to a stop outside a grandiose, sprawling building made of worn sandstone. I'm fairly certain that the spindly stone protrusions from near the edges could be described as turrets. I could imagine this as the Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, or Hogwarts, or basically the boarding school from any major fandom. It was a fitting place for this school.
As we unloaded from the bus we could hear the hyperventilation of dozens of teenagers, presumably because all of their dreams had just come true, or at least, the ones that involved idols. The actors and writers - writers of television, film, novels, comic books, everything - came flooding out of the building and trickling towards us with the trepidation of an explorer approaching a venomous snake. I spotted Matt Smith, Steven Moffat and Benedict Cumberbatch all walking together. And there was Cassandra Clare, author of the 'The Mortal Instruments' series! And Peter Jackson! And Ian McKellan!
"Do you see him?" Annisa asked.
"James?" I turned to face her.
"Of course," replied Isaac. He grinned. "Who else?"
"No, I don't see him," I replied, "But you're right, Isaac. We're probably going to be in his class. We'll see him soon enough. Allons-y!"
"What's that?" Annisa frowned.
"It's let's go in French," Isaac exclaimed, "Remember, it's what the Tenth Doctor says?"
"Um, yeah, sure," Annisa smiled.
We shuffled forward towards the steps that led up to the entrance. By now we were amidst a great herd of students all chattering about whose autographs they were going to get and whom they hoped to get as a teacher. Apparently there was some science/magic stuff all around that made this whole thing possible in the first place but nobody liked to ask. Everyone was too afraid that it would spoil the science/magic.
"So, why are you two so admiring of this guy?" Isaac asked.
"Well, to start with," I began tentatively, "he's hard-working. Thinking about how much effort he put into drama school makes me want to try harder at stuff. He's intelligent and mature but also extremely silly and fun."
"There's no point being grown-up if you can't be childish sometimes," Isaac put in.
"Fourth Doctor?"
"Yup."
"Nice. Anyway, I just in generally look up to him and want to be like him when I grow up. Not acting, writing instead, and preferably I wouldn't be a man but other than that. What about you Annisa?"
"Just that he's so sweet and caring." Annisa ran her hand along the banister. "Mostly what you said. You kind of stole all the words."
"Sorry about that," I giggled. "Does anyone have any idea where to go?"
Suddenly a hand appeared on my shoulder and another, identical mirror of it, on Annisa's. It had a pale complexion but was blotched red, which made sense given that the sun had decided to make an appearance and swelter us. Well, it was probably nothing to Annisa and Isaac but to me - and the hand - it was like I was playing Wii Tennis in a sleeping bag. Annisa and I turned around hurriedly, anxious to know who was being so 'friendly'.
Of course it was him. Of course. That's just how the Universe works.
"Um, I know where to go," James McAvoy ventured, "I hope I do anyway. I mean, I've been here for a year now so you'd think I would."
"Ah - Um - I - Uh," I stuttered, a sentiment echoed by the bu-bu-bu-bu sound that Annisa made.
"Oh, for crying out loud, you two." Isaac rolled his eyes. "Hello, I'm Isaac. This is Annisa and this is Joanne. They both have you down as their favourite actor and Annisa even has you down as her favourite 'fandom'. Please excuse them for sounding like fish."
"Excused. Actually I think I recognise those names." James fished a crumpled sheet of white paper with a table of names on it out of his pocket. "Yep, Annisa, got you and... Joanne?"
"Yeah?" I croaked.
"What's your last name? I can't find you on the list."
"Ferguson." Oh My God. What if I wasn't with him. What if I was with someone I respected but didn't ... that didn't have ... that wasn't James. He is my hero. He is my idol.
"Hm... I um... " He frowned. Then something in him like resolve seemed to crack and I could see his shoulders quivering. "Oh, would you -" giggle "-look at that. I uh, have been looking at it this whole time and just manipulating you with acting for my own pleasure. Got you."
"That was cruel and narcissistic," I noted, "but just funny enough to be worth it."
We all softened and turned back towards the school as James motioned us all towards the front doors. I could sense Annisa tense as James guided her with his hand then struggle to relax as she realised how strange that must have seemed. I giggled. This whole day was strange.
"Well," James announced as Isaac opened the door, "Welcome to the Internet School For Fandom Youngsters. Get the reference?"
"Yeah," we all answered together.
"Then you're going to love it here," James grinned.
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